Tuesday, 6 February 2018

Shouldn't I be Somewhere???

I haven't been to hospital for two weeks and it feels very odd indeed.

For most of the past eight months I have had at least one appointment most weeks and sometimes several in a two week period.  At times I felt I was living there!

I'm quite grateful to be there less frequently but I can understand why some people feel bereft at the end of active treatment.  You have a whole team of people lavishing care and attention on you; working to give you a good outcome. Then, as suddenly as it all started, they are gone and for a while you are on your own.  I'm quite enjoying it, but it still strange not to be dashing off there.

I wrote previously that cancer treatment can feel rather like a full time job and certainly it takes up rather a lot of time.  I am fortunate in that I have a job which is mainly (though by no means exclusively) office based and that my employer and colleagues have been supportive.  I have been able to work throughout, save for two weeks after surgery and the time to attend hospital appointments.  I have answered emails and done paperwork from odd corners around the hospital, worked from home and used one of our offices that is more local to my home than my own office.

As a result I feel that I simply transition between working on treatment and working at the everyday job.  Now that is helping me move out of treatment and into everyday life while finding yet another New Normal.

Having said all that, it still feels somewhat peculiar not to be leaving the office mid to late afternoon to get to radiotherapy!

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